miss saigon.........

it smells good in here

i'm trying to concentrate, but i must admit, the aromas wafting from the kitchen are severely distracting. thai food, to be exact. there's a man from thailand in my kitchen, cooking. i'm serious. what are the odds of that? think about it. when was the last time you had a thai person in your house? let alone cooking authentic thai food? how, you may ask, is this happening? i'll explain........

as most of you know, we have a housemate. a very amiable chap from germany. yes, actual germany, the country in europe. (unt he shpeaks like diss.......), and he's a really nice fellow, and he has friends whom we don't know, just as we have friends whom he doesn't know.

digress.........

you know how everybody has a type, sexually, that they like. i'm not going to try to describe what straight people like, because, quite frankly, i'm not sure. (other than big breasts. seems all straight men like big breasts. that's about the extent of my knowledge). but i have gay friends and i know their types. some like big bearish guys, with mass and hair everywhere, (i know, i don't get that either). some like young boyish types, who seem barely legal. (oh, i have to tell you this. sometimes when you read ads, like on craigslist or other classifieds, where gay guys are looking to hook up with other guys and they post notices to promote themselves and their desires, you see the phrase, young guys wanted, barly legal. barly. not barely. i crack up every time. i think if you're looking for barly legal boys you should make sure you can spell as well as a fifth grader, because after all, you might just end up with one.) no, i'm kidding. that's really too young. that's michael jackson young. roman polanski young. creepy.

i have friends who like them very preppy. like, i dunno, dean cain in that show lois and clark. (woof!! that includes me, actually, as one of my types. boy, that dean cain. can we talk???) and i have other friends who like older guys. i mean really older. like one foot in the grave. (and not so they'll die and leave them everything, they have their own money.) they just like older guys. (maybe they're hitting on the oxygen tank and like that a lot.) i don't pretend to understand. and then there are the guys who like the chubby ones. they call it girth and mirth. i swear. (is this too much information for my straight friends? if it is, please tell me, although my jersey city guts tell me i haven't gone over that line......yet.) the fatter the better. hot guys, that i'd boink in a heartbeat, and they look at me and think......too scrawny......go away, put on 100 pounds, and come back, and then let me rub your big belly. (yeah, i know, i don't get that either).

myself, i'm partial to muscular dudes with biceps and tight, um, ok, tight everything. but hey, in real life, you pick a partner, settle down........and the rest i think you know. love transcends all. you can have the hots for a hottie (that's how it works), but it's your partner above all, that catches your desire and your heart. (how was that? think husband will buy it? i'll send flowers with a note).

back...............

so, housemate has a type too. he likes very slight, very slender asian guys. they don't have to be young, they just have to have the body of a 10 year old boy. no, i'm kidding, but he does like them asian and delicate, like a lotus flower (no, i made that last part up), and so tonight, he invited a friend to dinner, and the friend offered to cook, and brought shopping bags filled with food, some bought, some to cook, and that explains the delicious, distracting to madness, aromas emanating from the kitchen.

uh oh........the dinner bell.........gotta go........

i'll be back........





so now, it's after dinner, and you know my favorite expression, the cheese stands alone, well, duh, apparently, if the eyes are a tad slanty, i turn into archie bunker. can't tell one asian from another!!!......... can't tell miss saigon from madame butterfly from suzy wong. the friend is actually vietnamese not thai. even more exotic, no? when was the last time you had an actual vietnamese man in your house at all? let alone cooking authentic vietnamese food. all together now.......NEVER!! well, me either!!!

and it was awesome. different. i've never had vietnamese cuisine, and the first course was this pancake (kind of like a moo shoo concept) only with big lettuce leaves that you wrapped pieces of the stuffed pancake in, and the pancake had ground pork, very lean, and tiny shrimp, (department of redundancy department....tiny shrimp!!) and you wrapped it up and dipped it in fish sauce. can you spell yum? and then this dish of roast pork chunks over rice with raw cucumbers and a soybean sauce. not soy sauce, soybean sauce. completely different, and OMG!! it was an epicurean wonder and quite splendid and flavorful. what a meal!

the young man, as i said was vietnamese, and we chatted and he was so genteel and so mild mannered and polite it was a joy. i asked him what he did for a living. are you ready? i mean, seriously, are you ready? i swear, i'm not making this up. he does manicures and pedicures in a salon, and is apparently very successful at it. but i mean honestly. talk about a walking cliche`. vietnamese nail techs?

hey, i'd like you to meet my jewish friend, sol, he's a banker. and i'd like to introduce you to my italian friend, vito, he's with the mob. oh, this is dimitri, he owns a diner, and here's my buddy ahmed, he's with the taliban. i mean really, you can't make this stuff up. i'm teasing, you know i am, but i got a kick out of the coincidence.

so i'm not going to blog tonight, because i ate too much and i'm sleepy, and i have to lie down and figure out exactly how he did those pancakes.

bon appetite............